Hello, Friends!
I’ve had this post sitting in a draft status for a very long time because when I decided to publish it, I wanted it to be right. Instead of talking about fashion, food, or drinks, today I’m talking about something that is and always has been very important to me. I also hope that it can help a Mama or bring this to light when someone may need it.
YOU WERE YOU BEFORE YOU WERE A MOM.
Read that again. Then maybe one more time. It’s so easy to get lost in the world of Mothering. You so deeply love the creature or creatures you’ve made. They fill your life with light and happiness and the need to take photos of them all day long. It’s also exhausting and overwhelming because you want to be the best “Mama” for them. But that starts with you being you.
When I was finally headed into motherhood, for those nine months I took a lot of time reflecting on how important it was going to be to still maintain me who I am as a person. I’ve always had that in the back of my head.
Early on, when pregnant with Theo, someone said to me “Oh so now your blog is going to be a Mom blog right?”. I thought how strange that was because I blog about the things that make my personality what it is. And not that I don’t share things here and there about the kids but this is my space. My place where I’m maybe not thinking about if I fed my kids healthy enough for the day, if I was a good enough Mom that day, or stressing over something else I did or didn’t do. It’s a good thing to have a hobby that’s just yours when so much of yourself is shared throughout the day.
I’ve also had many comments about how I’m dressed when with the kids. For example, “I don’t know how you find the time to look nice with kids” or “You don’t dress like a Mom.” Which that last one I don’t even know what that means. My inspiration to finally get this out of a draft status is my fellow blogger friend Tracey (“atraceofcool” on Insta go check her out). She is flawlessly and stylishly killing it as a Mom. We were chatting about this topic when I told her I had this post started and I randomly add things to. I feel she strongly understands the concept of still being a person and feeling like you. She has such fabulous style and doesn’t let motherhood hinder her.
The moral of the story is you can be a good Mom if you don’t keep some things around that made your heart sing before those babies did. Like dressing head to toe in sequins for example. I also want my children to grow up and be proud of the person I am and be happy that they grew up with a Mom that was happy and not only enriched their lives but hers too. And, of course I share the things I love with them (minus cocktail making of course), but sometimes Mama needs to dance in the kitchen, blast the music, grab some wine, and cook alone.
Take time for you. It’s important. I am by no means an expert parent and I’ll never pretend to be but this information I feel is true. To close this out, being a Mother is an absolute honor and I love that I got to be one and is truly one of my favorite things in my life.
I’m leaving you with this quote from a friend of mine that she told to me when I was watching her be a new mom herself and now I pass this sage wisdom on to others.
“You don’t change your life for your kids, they adapt to yours.”
